Saturday, November 16, 2013

there are times of mine, that i think of, when set off by a certain quality of light, or some smell and aroma, or movement..being in a vehicle, on a highway in and around nyc, especially if i am not the one driving, and having the streetlight in their shroud of yellow light, deepening its own shadows, outlining the garbage. pavement, guardrails, the way to go..and if the window is open or slightly open, the exhaust from diesel trucks, the cars, the water, old concrete, decay..rats..

Thursday, November 14, 2013

hehehehe.. so turns out my blood type is AB negative. which, when i looked it up:

¨ Extra vertebra.
¨ Higher than average IQ
¨ More sensitive vision and other senses.
¨ Lower body temperature
¨ Higher blood pressure
¨ Increased occurrence of psychic/intuitive abilities
¨ Predominantly blue, green, or Hazel eyes
¨ Red or reddish hair
¨ Has increased sensitivity to heat and sunlight
¨ Cannot be cloned
¨ Alien Abduction and other unexplained phenomenon


also
Being Rh negative is pretty special within itself, but do you have these magick powers too?

1, Empathy - You walk into a room and you instantly pick up on the vibes. You will know when someone has been laughing, crying, arguing, or is sad. It doesn't matter if someone denies they are sad or upset about something, you will know the truth. You can tune into their feelings so well that if you are not careful you take on the other persons emotions too. We need to learn to hold back a little, otherwise we are no use to those who need us most.

2, Psychic - Yes, you did know that was going to happen didn't you? How often to find yourself 'just knowing' something is going to happen before it does? Probably often right? It can get a little irritating can't it? Always knowing what is going to happen next. No one can hold a surprise party for you, or buy you a surprise gift can they? You already knew all about it before they have even decided to plan it.

3, Mysterious - How often do you get told that someone just can't figure you out? If you are Rh negative probably pretty often. This can often make others distrust you, or sometimes they might even think you are 'too nice' and therefore you must be hiding something. However, you attract lovers, unwanted attention and stalkers like no one else you have ever known! There is just something about you.. you are mysterious and your peers either love it or hate it.

4, Dreams - You have the most amazing pre-cognitive dreams, or just dreams that you can learn so much from. Your inner world teaches you so many lessons and you love to dream. Entering the dream realms is fascinating to you and you allow your dreams to teach you things, that others just don't seem to notice. Actually you are the one others will come to and ask what their dreams mean, you can usually figure things out pretty well.

5, Deep Thinker - You know how frustrating it is to sit thinking about the universe, the planets, the stars, insects, atoms, or anything really, but in a very deep contemplative way. And when you try to discuss these thoughts with your peers, they look at you like you are crazy? Yes, they are not a deep thinker like you and it can feel lonely at times when you are surrounded purely by others who aren't like you.

6, Fountain of Youth - OK not exactly forever young, but as you pass your 20s you will notice that a lot of people think you are younger than your years. Rh negatives seem to radiate youth no matter how old they get.

7, Creativity - Us negs are a creative lot, and it doesn't mean just art. Writing, poetry, crafts, baking, making things, designing stuff, building a business, performing, making music, rituals, no matter what it is you will have plenty of creative ideas and concepts just ready to express out on to the world. Why don't others get it? You might think to yourself, as they continue on with their mundane life without ever seeming to have the need to create or be creative in any way. Freedom to express this creativity is very important to negs.


Do your eyes change colour depending on your mood?


If they do you probably have Rh negative blood.

Our eyes can change colour depending on how we feel.
 
 
 
 
 

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

in this cholera study.. an avid jigsaw puzzle man named patrick, who actually  knows friends of mine, and rents from a friend of mine, was discussing with me, somehow, the human race. and its faults.. i believe the conversation started off with dumpstering food and all the waste that humans produce... and then it turned to alchoholism and drug addiction and what this society accepts in its tender blatency of harm..
'people feel its absense but don't know what they are missing'..said patrick..

its absence. the warm cozy in your gut, the grounded foundation, the solidity of being.. and there are generations of people, families that go through the discource and the never ending search for that feeling. to fill that hole. and they don't know what it is.. the chemicals that are synonumus with that hole .. the ones that fill it, the ones you are lacking when you turn to drugs like heroin, or seeven.... is dopamine..
and people become addicted to things, its searchh, the pain that goes along with it
in the same way that people become addicted to emotions. and ways of thinking, as well as the chemicals produced in anger or sadness... or are they addicted to the feeling, the mending, however slight that comes along after the hurt,...the endorfins.. the bandaid?

and it seems like this modern human world is always tring to bandaid things.. they are comfortable with this process, they mask the real reason for the open wound, physical or mental.. pharmaceutical companies and alot of modern doctors make this the rules and standards of their trade.
there is no questioning of the source.. exploring of the constitutes.. it is easier to treat the symptoms of a cold than the actual cold itself and why it is there.. or is it?
is it easier too treat depression with drugs of any sort. than the source of depression itself, and the reason on why it is there.... whet˙er hereditary- genes, or environmental.

i have been mulling for quite som time now, the wsources of the discource of modern society and its needs, addiciton.. how human nature got so out of whack, to produce such excasperated reactions to basic survival traits.

and i have been looking at what modern day people in first world countries, as in America, are looking for.. critiquing what is wrong here.. and what would make sense, as a change.


Tuesday, November 12, 2013

i am borrowing Sasha's latest post in The Icarus Project..http://www.theicarusproject.net/

Conversation yesterday with a friend about group dynamics: Some people are good at thinking micro, other macro. Some people are good at taking notes, others at synthesizing information after the fact. Some are good at making strangers feel welcome and networking and staying in touch. Some are good with technology. Some are good at tracking details. Some are good at being inspiring, articulating visions, formulating ideas. Some are good at making sure people understand each other. Some are good at being vulnerable. Some are good at creative problem solving. Some are good at making sense of what happened after the fact and writing the history...What else are people good at? What makes groups work?
 
 
hmm.
Its interesting that people that have done this med study before, kinda wish they could do it again.. to quote Dave'--it was great- i had all the food i could eat, i had time to myself, i hung out with people..'...hmmm
what in this world are we lacking as a whole, in humanity--- a huge question, loaded with all sorts of subgenres, i know..
but i think there needs to be, in peoples lives, a focused community space... a place where people can congregate, do things, get information, share ideas..

and that's what the general store with the wood stove and yarns told were.. that is what needle exchanges, and can return places are...soup kitchens..
that is what cafe's are for.. and pedestrian streets.. where you will see flyers, and regualrs, and exciting newness and comforting oldness..

but alot of times, people don't PRIORITIZE this.. or it gets blown up by jerks, ruined.. or there have to be a gazzillion rules set apon by those in charge-- cause someone always needs to be in charge- to fund it, or to get the grants to make it happen, or lock it up, or to clean up..b e personnel..
and it brings me back to the dirth of humanity, and questions simply like' why the fuck cant people clean up, moniter themselves?'
really, it is human nature, and learning, and the fact that most peoples parent suck, and they havent been taught morals, and whatnot, ..like how not to fuck something up, how to put effort into something and take pride into it, and have its back..

Monday, November 11, 2013

i forgot to say: i have a comic tumbler:
http://in-this-life-comics.tumblr.com

and there you will find all the retarded things i think about, and have done.. and more.. i just completed a 3 page comic in here so far.. yay! and also been on facebook too much..
yesterday was AWESOME, in this cholera med study cause all the Roseanne Halloween specials were on and i felt cozy, and oddly, missed New Jersey. Truth.

my own personal cholera epidemic-day 2..
so we downed the cholera as a group like we were insurgents doing a mass suicide, or kool aid something or other.. i immediately texted my daughter--'took the cholera- save me from myself''.
  i feel a little headachy with swells of emotion. but maybe that is how i normally feel. i can't tell.
  it is odd being in a new environment where i don't have dog distraction, people hanging over my back when  i use the computer, and where i have alot of free time.
i need to get stuff done.
make lists, check off lists, funnel creativity--in a cholera study. ha. but when life gives you lemons for three thousand dollars and makes you stay in the hospital for 11 days, well...lemonade. and comix. and research. and articles. and blog. hell, even one of those.

.. and how do i keep up this after hospital times? my mind is always a whirlwind..

after cholera i will be:

taking badass russian aikido

finding a job or another med study or a temp gig...


during cholera i will:

comix--draw, promote

articles--start with this blog..write for thebuskersproject...give myself assignments

make a list- a concise one of magazines, zines and blogs i want to contribute to..

find out how to get the house i want- or the like

and a buisiness- self employment- farm gigs- like mushrooms or geese. as a business..


get to it!!
love, me.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

Well, well well.. So officially I am here doing a medical study- for Cholera- where I get Vaccinated, and Innoculated with cholera--therefore pooping. Alot.
 But we will see- mainly because I am queen of not only Kombucha and Yogurt, but Lacto fermented stuff that I made and consumed, to be healthy. More on this later.
So I am stuck in here for 11 days, and I have my computer...which means that I will want to work on shit. And be productive. And focus. And write. And draw my comix.
More to come later as well.